Decisions, decisions

Today I feel torn between going out and to a big birthday celebration, for which I prepared a special gift, and needing time alone, doing what I really want to do, which is writing.

I haven’t been writing much during September and I feel grumpy.

I am angry at myself.

I know many people who’ll come tonight to the party and I know it could be fun, maybe. The main point is that I have to go 90 minutes each way by public transport and I feel tired thinking of it. I’d have to leave early to catch the last train.

I am angry because of the things I’d get done in these 3 hours.

Time is precious right now, because I have a job where I need to focus, especially during the training weeks.

I am thinking about arguments to get myself to the party and now I know something is off.

So I check in with my body, to release that tension and to feel what decision serves me best.

That makes it very clear and easy, my body relaxed immediately when I thought of a cozy weekend at home – so I will do this.

I feel better now – my body always tells the truth. It’s my job to listen and act accordingly.

3 thoughts on “Decisions, decisions

  1. Sometimes, rest is all that is needed to make us feel at home with ourselves, with our decisions, with writing 🙂 the party may have been missed, but the gift can still be given I guess.

  2. You sound just like me. I’m a HSP (highly sensitive person) and some times the big events tire me out before I even think about it. I’d much rather stay at home and retreat. Outings can be fun but they have to be done the “right way” with me or else I get overwhelmed and exhausted. I’m glad you listened to yourself and will enjoy your Saturday!

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